Well, the weather has finally decided to stay warm. My garden is calling. Seedlings force their way through the soil and into the sunlight. The change from a seed to a plant never ceases to amaze and invigorate me. The process of growth and change are miraculous. So, why can’t I have my own metamorphosis?

I yearn to change and feel good about myself. I think Spring is really the time to start anew, not Winter. All the world is waking up and becoming aware of itself, so why not me, too? I have been frustrated this winter by my inability to progress in my efforts to remake myself. My meditation practice has suffered. My healthy behaviors have stumbled. I have stagnated. I stopped living in the present and started doubting myself and pulling up all the tortures of my past. Time to stop.

Pay attention to the growth in the world and the way my soul mirrors this becoming. I deserve to feel content and alive. I need to contact that serene being within me. I need to slow down and watch the beauty of nature growing around me. Stop dwelling in the pain of the past and start reaching for the sun with the plants in my garden.

This morning, when I made my tea, I stopped worrying and really paid attention to what I was doing. Selecting the cup — pretty flowers and butterflies on the outside to please my eyes, a comfortable handle to please my hand. Heating the water — listening to the water begin to bubble, feeling the warmth, smelling the steam. Selecting the tea — wanting a strong flavor, picking among the choices (Darjeeling, English Breakfast, Tropical Green, and dozens more), selecting a yummy aroma. Pouring sweetener into the mug — watching the particles trickle from the spoon, catching a whiff of the sweetness. Brewing the tea — watching the water change from clear to deep, rich brown; smelling the tea as the steam rises; feeling the comforting warmth of the tea through the mug. Adding cream — watching the thick, white liquid pour from the container; watching the dark brown turn creamy white. Finally taking that first sip — luxuriating in the aroma, swirling the rich brew in my mouth, feeling the warmth move from my mouth to my throat. So much beauty and pleasure, if you just live in the moment and feel gratitude for what you have.

I am feeling reborn, now. Reinvigorated when it comes to caring for myself. I deserve to reach for the sun and experience all the beauty that life has for us, if we just notice it. I will be present in the moment, while working to reach contentment and serenity that I need to be successful as a human being.