It is that in-between season, not quite Spring and not quite Winter. Plants are waking up from their rest. Trees are pumping pollen into the air as quickly as possible. Flowers are beginning to spread across the land. And for me, it’s time to decide. Will I keep working on myself or will I give up?

Time for some wise mind. Emotional mind says give it up, you aren’t good enough to succeed. Suspiciously, the voice of emotional mind sounds very much like my mother. Rational mind points out that I have managed to be healthier in the past. I have lost weight and worked out and felt good about myself. So, what is the middle ground? Accept that most of my life I was told I was not pretty or smart or worthy. That a lot of the time I was told I was fat, ugly, stupid, and a major mistake. I can’t change those facts. I can let them go and stop giving my abusers so much power. It isn’t easy. It requires hard effort and determination. But, to succeed and love myself and care for myself, I have to rise above it and let go. The lotus flower rises above the mud and water to show its beauty. I will be a lotus flower. I will keep trying to eat healthy. I will work out. I will be compassionate with myself. I will be better. I will stop judging myself against an impossible standard. No two flowers bloom exactly alike. All of them are beautiful in their own way. People are like that, too. We shouldn’t cause each other pain with judgments and unrealistic expectations. Being mindful means we should look for the positive in the moment, not expect things to be different than they are. Adding wise mind to that, we pair acceptance of ourselves with an ongoing effort to take better care of ourselves. Accepting the past and feelings, then letting them pass like dandelion seeds on the wind.